Big, Bad, Bunny Wabbit: Bunnyman (2011)

 

A trio of teenage couples are out on a drive, only to be harassed by a guy in an old pick-up truck after cutting in front of him, supposedly just like Jeepers Creepers, only you can actually tell this psycho had heard of something called a speed limit, leaving us with an unimpressive scene where these kids are supposed to be"chased" by this creep.  Believing they can sooth the savage beast with an apology, (for cutting in front of him because he was too slow?) they decided to stop their car and had one of them go out, confront the truck driver that's obviously out to hurt them, begging the driver to just leave them alone.

And this went on for what felt like hours...

Trucker's response: give the girl a broken nose against his truck's door. Yeah, not surprised for that one.

 

Obviously rattled, the group decided to wait out on the freak, hoping he'll just leave them alone. Some long, dragging, monumentally, suicide-inducing moments later, the trucker did eventually left, but returns later to crash their car into some bushes.

With their car broken down, one of them decided to be the heroic mechanic and tries to fix it, only to get killed when the mad driver came back, hitting their car while he's still underneath it, apparently running him over. Now with a dead friend and a dead car, what's left of them are forced to walk out and find some help, wherein they continue to act out as cardboard morons with the emotional capability of that of a rusty nail, and fell prey to a retard in a big fuzzy suit, wielding a chainsaw. (How they can't outrun him is a big mystery...)

Seriously? Had you seen the size of this guy's feet?! You can't outrun THAT?!

It all leads to familiar territory later on, including a new plot point involving some cannibal family living in the woods, Bunnyman is still one shitty film with little to no redeeming qualities to satisfy a good slasher fan. The kills are done away with cheap blood splashes just as the killer bunny-freak's about to cut someone, so that's one point down for gore, so you had to expect something else to make up for this, right? Of course, but even in those the movie fails; it's devoid of good character build, thanks to some really wooden actors and a script that sounds like someone in a 3rd Grade level education had written down (their friend is dead and they hardly cringed at the matter, plus they even had the audacity to joke around! Plus who goes to a roadtrip without bringing any food, water or a single phone?! Yeah, none of this morons had brought a phone! Who wrote this dreck?!), direction is futile with its God-awful pacing, and the whole idea of a killer in a bunnysuit hardly makes any sense. I mean, this guy's a deformed cannibal, of course I get that, but was there a reason for him to choose to wear the furry costume? Maybe there was and I just missed it during one of my half-sleep states, but you might as well has this guy run around nude cuz it's not doing anything for the story.


What's even more surprising for me is that this Z-grade garbage actually had enough fans to support a sequel; I mean, how the fuck did that happened? This is practically a Texas Chainsaw Massacre clone done with almost no budget, weird characters played by bad actors, zero gore shots and a ridiculous concept, but I guess even retarded flicks had their audiences, those who considers it the "so-bad-it's-effin'-funny-good" kind of movies. Whatever it is that these people saw in this bung-hole, I rather not get involve, as I would like to end this post with my sanity still intact.

I always say that I appreciate a good effort, and Bunnyman certainly tried, but all these flaws are really distracting and I can't help but trash this movie to the extent that I'm thinking of defecating on it. (Which I won't. I maybe pissed, but I'm not high!) I'm just glad I got mine via stream, saving me the worries of it taking up my good tape spaces! See it if you want. I don't care. It's your rent money you're wasting!